Well, my new title sounds more like a failed comic book than a blog title, but it should spark a little more interest than the name GameGen. Besides, Zombies and Sex Robots just sounds like a sleazy piece of science fiction, and I like it, dammit!This past year I've been trying to create a little more content for my readers before I begin publicizing my main web site.
Okay, I'll tell you a little secret: Shhhhh...I'm trying to write literature while I simultaneously write movie scripts for the same stories...so I can sell them all to Hollywood, make trillions of dollars, and become the next false messiah.
Movies? You may ask. Yes! Movies! Oh, not just some crazy existential films, mind you, about virtual reality, replete with minimalist Tron landscapes, or distopian Matrix scenarios, but movies about games, gamers, game tech, AI, and of course, about robots (yes, eventually sex robots).
You see, in a depressed economy, the entertainment business rarely suffers, AND they NEVER stop making movies, SO they might as well make mine.
Of course, all of you are invited. Heck, if you can write a GameGen type script, or any other type of story which might appeal to male movie goers from 16 to 28, you too may have a shot.
Why am I so confident that I can pull it off when there are thousands of professionals every year who can't seem to do it? Simple. I'm a gamer, they are not. Why is that important? Because Hollywood screws it up almost every time they try.
The average Hollywood executive wouldn't know a good Game Generation story if one jumped up and bit them in the arse! But I'm going to try to help them. That's right, ME! Wade Buffington! Average delusional idiot!
Hey! After all, I'm everything a Hollywood writer is: I'm self-centered, egotistical, I have some serious megalomaniac tendencies, and I should probably be on some type of medication (other than massive amounts of coffee).
______________________
As for those of you who think you can live without a good sex robot around the house, I submit the following advertisement for your approval.
You are now in a dream sequence. A large circus tent rises before you and and the electronic salesman scintillates
into view. "What's this guy selling," you think to yourself.
"They slice! They dice! They'll cook, they'll clean, they'll even do the dishes! Hell, they'll do you, too! That's why we call them Sex rob ... er, I mean Synthetic Companions! ... heh heh," the salesman chuckles.
"Yes indeedy! They'll play video games with you all night long, after your friends have all gone home! AND maybe teach you a few games you never imagined! And, when it's cold, Synthetic Companions know how to keep you warm at night. Real warm! They're like an electric blanket!"
"And, hey! Don't worry if you get bummed-out about your life as an out-of-work projectionist due to the recent upgrade to digital, because you can cry on the Synthetic Companion's shoulder. That's right, they won't care if you seem whiny. They won't even tell you you should have finished college instead of drinking yourself into a coma.
Synthetic Companions will only sound like your parents if you program that way. They'll do all the disgusting jobs around your apartment you can't get your girlfriend to do. Hey! They'll even rub your nasty, toe-jam encrusted feet, if you ask them to. They won't complain about it!"
"They'll say things like, 'Thank you dear, would you like me to get you a beer or give you a blow job?' or 'Pardon me sweetie, but I've drawn you a bath and have prepared your favorite meal.'""Synthetic Companions don't need foreplay, either. When you're ready for sex, they just say, 'Let's do it, baby!' or, for you ladies, they can make love last as long as you want! And they'll never roll over and fall asleep while you're telling them about your horrendous day at the doctor's office."
"All Synthetic Companions also come with an integrated (and upgradable) education chip. That's right! You can send them to work every morning to work as a chemical engineer, a doctor, or even a lawyer, while you relax at home in front of the TV or surf the Internet for good deals on Amazon.com!""Yes, our Synthetic Companions will scrub the dirt off your lonely souls, and make you feel like somebody really does love you, even if you look like a genetic experiment gone terribly wrong or your personality is like a rabid wolverine or a shit slinging monkey. Synthetic Companions don't care!"
"They are especially useful in taking care of the handicapped and mentally deficient! They really don't mind getting up in the middle of the night and cleaning up your 90-year-old mother who just did a doodie in her bed! They're programmed to be pleasant 24-7!""They're great for invalids and the severely handicapped, too! Synthetic Companions won't let a wheelchair or a disfigured body get in the way of wild, kinky handicapped sex! After all, doesn't everyone deserve to be touched in naughty places?"
"Yep! Synthetic Companions are great for everyone!"
"They'll plug you into a whole new universe of 'Synthetic' possibilities! All for a very reasonable price! Our online purchases are discrete and confidential."
"Synthetic Companions are fabricated, tested, and then given a one-way plane ticket. All you need to do is pick them up at the airport and bring them home. They even make great traveling companions!"
"So, would you like a Jeri Ryan (Seven of Nine)? How about Jessica Alba? or maybe a nice Johnny Depp? We have many models to choose from! This week's special! Take 10% off all our Angelina Jolie and Hugh Jackman units!"
(Man! I really gotta lay off the caffeine)
